


It feels like falling

by WritingWarships



Series: Late Night Adventures [2]
Category: Voltron: Legendary Defender
Genre: Angst, Angst and Feels, Comfort/Angst, Emotional Hurt/Comfort, He tries tho, I feel lowkey bad for Lance, I'm Sorry, IT IS 3 AM I'M SO TIRED, Keith (Voltron) is Bad at Feelings, Langst, Mild Language, Sad Lance (Voltron), Swearing
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2016-09-24
Updated: 2016-09-24
Packaged: 2018-08-17 00:58:34
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,663
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/8124442
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/WritingWarships/pseuds/WritingWarships
Summary: Lance has a lot of insecurities.





	

**Author's Note:**

> It is 3 am, I feel dead inside, and I'm 99,9% sure there are spelling and grammar faults everwhere. I can't keep my eyes open though, so I couldn't care less for the time being. I hope you enjoy the angst wile I'm going to sleep. (Also, props to you if you know from what song the title is)

It had only been this afternoon that Shiro had stepped up to Keith and had requested to talk with him. Apparently the Black lion and Shiro had been, well, _communicating_ , and they had noticed a disturbance in the bond between the Blue lion and it’s paladin.

And so Shiro had said, _Keith quotes,_ the following sentences; “You and Lance share a special bond too. Maybe you can talk to him and find out what is holding him back from completely bonding with his lion.”

And that’s basically how he ended up banging on lance’s door in the middle of the night, at Lord knows what time after twelve. He hadn’t had a chance to speak with Lance in private yet, so he had decided going to his room late at night was the only option.

“Lance, if you weren’t awake yet, you sure as hell are now! Open the door!”

Finally Keith heard movement on the other side of the door. It sounded like Lance was stumbling out of bed and had started slowly moving towards the door when Keith suddenly heard a loud crash. It was quiet for a moment before a string of Spanish curse words were heard. Keith suspected the other boy had fallen, but he kept his mouth shut.

When the door finally opened, Lance gave him the stink eye. Keith wished he could be mad about that, but honestly, Lance had every right to do so. Keith had woken him up in the middle of the night. If the same thing had happened to him, the Red paladin would probably have had the same reaction.

“What the hell are you doing here, mullet-boy?”

Nonetheless Keith rolled his eyes at Lance’s words.

“Listen, I need to talk to you.” He slipped into the room before Lance could protest.

Lance let out a sigh and closed the door behind him, turning around to face Keith again. “What now? What’s so important that it can’t wait till next morning?” He looked sceptical and Keith just blurted out the first thing that came to his mind.

“You.”

“Me?” Lance looked more confused than anything else.

Keith looked around the room, he had no idea how he would ask Lance what was wrong. _Damnit_ Shiro. It’s not like he can just ask ‘Hey Lance, why are you and your lion not bonding?’, that’s ridiculous. Lance would just push him out of the room and shut the door in his face, and Keith wouldn’t even try to stop him. He could still feel Lance’s gaze on him so he tried to form a full and correct sentence in his head.

“Shiro talked to me.”

This didn’t help the confused look on Lance’s face at all.

“Shiro talked to you.” It was more a question than a statement.

“Yeah, he did. He told me that his Lion, you know with the Black lion being the head and stuff, sensed that something was wrong.” Keith went with his hand through his hair. ”With you.”

As soon as he noticed how bad that sounded he stumbled to cover it up. “With your bond! There- There was some kind of disturbance in the bond between you and your lion! And, well, we wanted to know...” He trailed of, not knowing how to continue.

“You wanted to know why me and Blue aren’t bonding?”

Keith nodded at Lance’s words. Lance, however, just shrugged and gave Keith one of his signature grins. It wasn’t as genuine as normal though.

“I’m sorry to tell you buddy, but me and Blue are this close.” He hold up his pointer and middle finger which were entangled with each other. “So if you excuse me, I’m going to sleep again.”

Before Lance even had the chance to turn around he had been shoved against the wall next to his bed.

“Ow! Keith what the fuck man! My fucking shoulder.”

Keith couldn’t care less about his shoulder. “Lance, maybe we aren’t as close as you and Blue are, but I do know something’s up. And it’s not just because Shiro brought it up. Don’t you think I don't notice how you’re the first to stop laughing or how you try to get away as fast as possible as soon as one of our trainings or meetings are finished?” His hand still held one of Lance’s shoulders against the wall, even if it wasn’t as firmly as before.

The only light source in the dimly lit room was some kind of Altean lantern Lance had found. It caused shadows to play on both of their faces. It was dead silent for a moment, the only sound that could be heard being their mixed breaths. Because they were so close, Keith could finally see the anger that started flaring up in Lance’s eye.

“You don’t know _shit_. There’s nothing wrong with me, okay?” He placed both hands on Keith’s chest and pushed his away so he wasn’t pinned against the wall anymore. “Everything is fine!”

Keith felt his own anger coming back. “No, it’s not! We want to help Lance! We really do. But how are we supposed to do that when you can’t even admit that everything’s _not fine,_ and that there’s something keeping you from bonding with Blue?!” He poked Lance in his chest with his pointer finger. “Just tell me what’s wrong, you idiot.”

Lance felt himself losing control but he couldn’t bring himself to care. “You wouldn’t understand! I am not like you, or Shiro, or any of the others!” He went with a hand through his hair, letting out an exasperated sigh. “I can’t fight like you, I’m not smart and handy like Hunk and Pidge, I’m not a leader like Shiro, I can’t think and come up with plans in the same way as Allura and I can’t help everyone like Coran!”

Instead of the anger that had been in Lance’s eyes only seconds ago, all Keith saw now was sadness. He looked like he was at a loss for what to do, so he just stared right past Keith.

Lance spoke up again, this time his voice much softer sounding. “I’m just- I’m just here, ya know? I‘m just taking up some space here without being of any use. I’m just an inconvenience. I’m not even worthy to fly the Blue lion. Why would I be?”

He exhaled shakily and the glistening of his eyes wasn’t just Keith’s imagination.

“There are so many more experienced and just in general better people out there. Why me?” His voice was so brittle, Keith was afraid it could break at any moment.

“Why am I here while my family is at home on earth? Maybe they- Maybe they aren’t even alive anymore! I don’t know how light-years and travelling through space and time works!”

When Lance finally made eye contact with him again, Keith’s heart shattered into fragile, tiny pieces. He had never seen the other boy look so small, so hurt and so utterly hopeless.

“I’m already not that much, but without them? I don’t have any purpose. I’m nothing.” He spat out the last words like they were poison in his mouth.

Keith couldn’t stand hearing Lance talk like that anymore. How could he possibly think like this? How could he actually think he wasn’t important or just as valuable as the others on the team? Keith shook his head and took a step towards Lance, not wanting to overstep the already broken boundaries, but also wanting to make clear that he wanted to comfort him. He gently, but firmly, grabbed the blue paladins shoulders, forcing him to look up to Keith.

“Lance, I’m not great with words-”

“No shit.”

“Can you please just let me fucking finish, you asshat.” Keith sighed before looking into Lance’s eyes sternly, holding his gaze.

“You are not useless, okay? You may act like a complete asshole at times-”

“Wow, I didn’t realise you were this bad at-”

“ _But_ ,” Keith began loudly to cut Lance’s sentence off, “You actually care a lot about everyone. And it shows. You always try to cheer us up with your lame ass jokes, but you know what? It works! Maybe the things you add to the group are not something you can actually hold, but they are just as, if not more, important.” Keith was laying himself bare and at other times he would have felt  embarrassed, but not now. Lance needed to hear his.

“If I’m being honest, I actually look up to you. I can’t interact with others like you can. I still haven’t fully grasped the concept of human emotions. But you, you always know just what to say when it actually matters. You are persistent and curious, and I wouldn’t want anyone else as my partner in the Blue lion.”

Lance’s eyes began to water once again, but Keith acted like he didn’t notice.

“As for your family, I don’t know how all of this works either. But what I do know is that you’re fulfilling your purpose here, as the Blue paladin.” Keith smiled softly at Lance as the tears finally spilled over his cheeks.

“And I promise, that as soon as this is over and we return back to earth, I will help you seek your family and stay by your side as long as you need me too.”

Lance was an ugly crier. He was full out sobbing right now. Snot was all smeared under his nose and his face crinkled up when he gasped for breath, but Keith didn’t care. Lance grabbed Keith's upper arms and before Keith could react, Lance had already buried his head in Keith’s shoulder. He let the boy cry and rubbed, what he hoped were, comforting circles on the small of his back.

“You’re going to be okay Lance.” Keith kept muttering these words into the other boy’s hair, repeating them in the hope Lance would start to believe him.

“We are going to be okay.”

**Author's Note:**

> Thank you for reading! Come yell with/at me on my Tumblr 'thatdamfangirl'


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